Insurgent on the lose

Insurgent on the lose

Postby Fraser921 » Thu Sep 15, 2022 11:28 am

ST. PAUL, MN — Mike Lindell, the CEO of MyPillow, had his cell phone seized by the FBI this week. The FBI is pursuing subpoenas on additional data and documents from the "My Pillow Guy," but has been unable to breach his MyPillow fort thus far.

"We are besieging Mr. Lindell, but we had not accounted for the patented interlocking foam filling being so difficult to penetrate," said Special Agent Bob Janzen to reporters outside the MyPillow guy's fort on Wednesday. "This fortress of mattress toppers, Giza Dreams™ bed sheets, and pillows have formed an impenetrable barrier we have been unable to breach."

So far Lindell has held off the armed agents with one-time FREE gift popup ads, followed by a round of invitations to join the MyPillow mailing list. Sources say Mr. Lindell is pacing inside the fort wearing night vision goggles and preparing his arsenal for a MyPillow fight. "He's even wearing armor made from a MyPillow bathrobe over MyPillow formal pajamas and MyPillow slippers, all textured for maximum comfort," said Janzen. "This won't be easy."

Critics have contended that Mr. Lindell may risk being indicted for bribery if he offers a MyPillow to the agents, but even Mr. Lindell's harshest critics have not been able to disprove his claim that MyPillow products are "the most comfortable you will ever own."

At publishing time, Merrick Garland was forced to tie another string around his finger to remind him to investigate the Biden family's corrupt dealings with Chinese companies, as he had again forgotten.
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Re: Insurgent on the lose

Postby mikelp » Thu Sep 15, 2022 8:56 pm

great report!

Gov Ron DeSantis should have provided a Classic My-Pillow to each of the 50 illegal 'migrants' he had flown to Martha's Vineyard. Their arrival seems to have caused a public health catastrophe there. Maybe Obama can put them up at his multimillion dollar mansion there.
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Re: Insurgent on the lose

Postby Fraser921 » Thu Sep 15, 2022 9:56 pm

LOL :lol:

The beautiful rich white liberals are all in a dither..

John Kerry retreated to his 20 m dollar yacht in Newport
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Re: Insurgent on the lose

Postby dan_s » Fri Sep 16, 2022 3:32 pm

IMO what the GOP is doing is brilliant. Shipping illegals to areas controlled by the Dems forces the media to cover the border crisis.
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Re: Insurgent on the lose

Postby Orindakid » Fri Sep 16, 2022 5:42 pm

Sue the bastards!


MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell announced on Friday that he is planning to sue the FBI after his phone was seized this week, saying that "this will set a precedent."
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